Vulnerability is Your Superpower
A dedication, a pause, and a reflection
Speaking out can intensify our vulnerability. We feel exposed when we share our thoughts out loud, especially in formal settings, such as giving a work presentation or a speech at a ceremony. We feel singled out when we speak alone, and not always in a good way.
Our ancient ancestors learned that fitting in was safer than standing out. They also knew that it’s dangerous to have all eyes on them, to stand alone, and to feel uncertain- all elements of public speaking.
Your family of origin and upbringing may have reinforced your belief that it’s better to blend in than stand out. They may have rewarded you for following the script or shamed you for speaking out.
This primal instinct and conditioning explain why seven out of ten people dread public speaking and why many speeches often feel formulaic and predictable; humans seek approval and a sense of belonging.
So what if I told you that standing out could be your superpower?
When you craft a unique speech from your specific point of view, you will strengthen your bonds, the very thing your subconscious fears you will hurt.
When you work through the discomfort before your team presentation, or trust that your Mother of the Groom speech will go well, you can create stronger connections and a sense of belonging. Here are three ways that I harness my vulnerable superpower:
Before I give my presentation, I dedicate my speech to someone. This helps me feel grounded and connected to another person, so I don’t feel alone when I speak.
While I’m presenting, I make sure to take calming breaths and plan intentional pauses so I stay present and connected to myself. While I count to three seconds, I can read the room and take in body language cues to ensure I’m communicating effectively, rather than plowing through my talk.
After I finish my speech, I check in with my audience to ensure I communicated my ideas clearly, either through a question-and-answer session or a post-talk survey. My audience is my barometer for how well my speech was received. Because it’s not really about me, it’s about us.
Each of these steps —making a dedication, taking pauses, and reflecting — opens me up to feeling vulnerable, for sure, but I’ve learned that this is how I make a genuine connection, both with others and with myself.
Which of these steps can you add to your speaking routine? A dedication, a pause, or a reflection?
Once you start speaking your truth, you won’t want to hide any longer. Imagine what you could say and do with your superpower.
Stay Calm & Speak On,
Jessica
Want to get vulnerable with me? You can schedule your personal speaking feedback from me HERE.